We make holes in teeth!

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

You Made the Internet

Today, I offer you something mundane and yet pertinent to your daily routine, and the incessant need to get yourself distracted from it. This is your blog post. Because you made the internet. Enjoy it.

On the train this morning a late-middle aged man reads a manual in Chinese printed on homemade paper. He is learning something which you try to surmise from the numbers and images. Nothing makes sense. They use the expression "it's all Greek to me" but they've clearly never taken a long look at this script. The man looks confused. Perhaps it's Thermal Physics.

It's not Thermal Physics.

A young man in a North Face jacket reads a Financial Markets book. He has a dazed look that speaks to his longing to be in bed. The words jump from the page and hit his eyes but go no further. He is thinking about his breakfast when he gets to work. He will not learn anything from this book. In the end, he will never be good at Wall Street. This will save him from being a greedy prick. He will eventually become a school teacher and his kids will love him. The money will not be good but he will die happy.

There is a woman on the train that is wearing a white coat and enough makeup for 23 people. She is not unattractive, but you wonder what would cause her to wear so much makeup that she could press her face into another person and give them an instant Halloween mask. She wears red lipstick, perhaps to contrast the overly light makeup and white jacket. She looks almost like a caricature of herself. If she were older she would look like a comic strip. She barrels off the subway, perhaps in search of a hose to rinse off.

In the office, a very old Jewish coworker talks on the phone all day and complains about someone who came to his house to read the meter. You don't care that he's Jewish, but he does wear a little hat, the name of which you can say but you don't know how to spell. The image is better for the reader to explain that he's 5-5, 250 pounds, and possible a child of Moses. He has a slight nasal whine to his voice. He makes at least 12 phone calls to the utility company asking whey they knocked on his door this weekend to read the meter. You hear all this because you forgot your headphones today.

When you get to the office you have a coffee, which is supplied by the company. It does not taste good.


  • At 12:48 PM, Blogger Daniela Kubick said…

    Norm, are you crazy? Headphones are a must. I don't leave the house without them since co-workers are such complainers. All of the sudden a quiet and piecefull, yes also mundane afternoon, turns into a freakshow. So be prepared!


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